Coming face to face with yourself

A while ago I agreed to guest blog for someone (the blog will be published on 14 March and I will retweet for you) - easy peasy I thought!  I wrote something last week, well ahead of the agreed deadline and felt generally pleased with myself.  I then spent the weekend away in a training course at Launde Abbey.  Launde Abbey is a wonderful place of stillness and prayer set in the Leicestershire countryside. 

I sensed on Saturday morning that I should spend the free time on Saturday afternoon rewriting the blog that I had written.  In the silence and beauty of Launde Abbey I felt God asking me to be totally honest, to unearth the deep truth and write about that.  So I found myself coming face to face with the me that is so often buried beneath busyness and activity and from which I hide.  The rewriting wasn't easy but the physical place was certainly conducive to such honesty.  Finalising the blog today was quite emotionally draining particularly as I was back in my usual routine sitting in my usual place at the computer.

I was with someone about 10 days ago who was also coming face to face with herself.  She had just bought her first house.  To say that the property had "potential" would be an understatement - it needs so much work!  I am really sure though that when the work is done I will be very jealous of the house.  Even in need of such repair the property felt safe and homely and I can really understand why the owner was suddenly facing issues from the past that had laid buried for so long. 

Over the weekend away during the most liturgical and traditional of Eucharist services someone on the course came face to face with himself and wept like a child when receiving the wine.  Again, the safety of the place, the people, the circumstances seemed to release something deep and hidden.  There seemed to be no need to talk about it, the release seemed of itself to bring healing and restoration.

This has led to me to wonder how rarely we give ourselves time and space to come face to face with those deep buried truths about ourselves.  If we are not able to create and find those safe spaces for ourselves are we able to do that for others?  Is a change of physical location key in this sort of honesty?  Does God long for us to find those safe locations where in His presence we can come face to face with ourselves ... and still feel loved and accepted.